Everything is way cooler when it has "space" in front of it. Could you hand me the space-ketchup? Quick! My space-glasses! I have a zit on my space-bottom.
Some things are more adorable with "baby" preceding them. That lamp is way teeny. A baby-lamp!
This also goes for the word "wee". My wee-sweater is much more fun to wear than a normal sweater because Jared will refer to it as "your wee sweater."
Speaking of small looking things, I read an article the other day about how global warming is creating smaller versions of animals that might mess with the the (already damaged) ecosystem as we know it. All I could think about was "aaaaaaawwwwwwwww!!! teeny animals!". Not exactly the hard charging environmentalist up in here. Wee animals!! Squee!!
Where was I? Oh yes - wee animals! Once I had a hamster named Fluffy, but she died. Prior to her dying we got a dog. The dog's antics revealed how fundamentally uninteresting a hamster can be. I will try to never own a rodent as a pet again. Even when she was rolling around in her hamster ball, desperately trying to escape the dog, she was terrible. Stupid rodents. They do nothing.
I'm afraid of getting an animal & committing myself to it & it being a dud. I'm terrified that I'll adopt a dog & it will be an asshole. Then I'll be stuck because I've already invested so much of my world view into thinking that I'm the kind of person that will adopt a dog.
That's why I don't understand people who adopt cats. Cats are known assholes. You are consciously choosing to add an asshole to your home. The likelyhood of your cat being cool is like....one in ten. Or less. Those are hard numbers that I totally did not just pull out of my space-ass.
No comments:
Post a Comment